Saturday, 22 October 2011
Xander's Birth Story
As
everyone knows our birth story starts with a planned induction. After 36 weeks
of pregnancy we’d reached the end of our sanity rope. Growing Alexander had
been wonderful, but also very stressful and emotionally draining; 8 months of
holding our breath waiting for the worst to happen but hoping, praying, for the
best.
Our
induction was in for the long ride again; although not as long as Anabelle! Alexander only made us wait 3 days instead of
5! It’s going to be a long read.
Tuesday
11th October
I arrived
at the hospital and given an hour to settle in before being examined and
starting the induction. Despite being 1cm dilated my cervix was still very unfavourable
and quite far back. I will admit I was a
little disappointed after all the pre-labour symptoms I’d been having for weeks. So they started the induction and I sat
around waiting for things to happen.
In
the meantime the baby-doctors from special baby care came to see me to have a
chat about any potential problems that Xander might experience because he was being
delivered 4 weeks prematurely. I wanted
to be fully informed of what to expect if he needed a little stay with SCBU and
what the ‘usual’ problems they usually encountered with a 36 week baby. They
assured me that they weren’t expecting him to need their help at all and that
if he had any premmie issues they would probably be minor but that they would
be present at his birth as a precaution.
About
12 hours later I started having quite nasty period pains and all the usual
Braxton Hicks contractions but nothing that hadn’t already been happening for
weeks previous. I took some painkillers
before going to bed and by 2am I was feeling fine again and got a good few
hours sleep.
Wednesday
12th October
I
woke up about 8am with nasty period pains again. I was examined again and was
gutted to be told that there had been no change since yesterday morning; still
only 1cm dilated and still far back. I
was given the next pessary and sat around waiting again.
Around
1pm I started having really bad pains that by 2pm had turned into
contractions. It appeared I was going
into labour. By 4pm the contractions were
coming thick and fast and I didn’t know what to do with myself. This quickly
turned into contractions overlapping each other; one was starting before the
previous one had finished. Agony.
The midwife gave me some pethadine to try and
ease the pain; it made me woozy which surprisingly helped me cope quite a lot! I’d reacted badly to the pessary and my body
was hyper-stimulating and almost going into labour too quickly.
The doctors explained that this was
dangerous for Alexander because neither of us were getting a rest in between
contractions and potentially could cause a placental abruption.
I
was taken to delivery suite, not to have my baby but to have some 1:1 care and be
given a drug to stop the contractions and stop the induction.
As
relieved as I was to get rid of the intense pain I was really disappointed that
things had started only to have to be stopped again. The consultant said she
didn’t want to give me another pessary and that she would examine me in the
morning to try and break my waters, or failing that make a plan.
After
a few hours recovering and being observed down in delivery suite I was taken
back upstairs to the wards to have some sleep.
I didn’t have any more pain other than period pains all nights and by
morning was feeling really despondent.
Thursday
13th October
Consultant
came to examine me at 8.45am and I fully expected her to tell me there had been
no change again. However, I was very
pleased when she said I was 2cm dilated now and although it would be ‘tricky’
but she reckoned she’d be able to break my waters and then after a few hours
put me on a drip to really get my contractions going again but in a more
controlled way. Cue me being moved very quickly downstairs to delivery suite
again. I phoned Jon at 9.00 after the examination, who was already in work, to
come in. He works in Cardiff which is
about an hour away from the hospital. (Driving within the speed limit anyway!)
When
I was induced with Belle it was breaking my waters that really got things
going, and she arrived 5 hours later, so I was fully expecting the same or
similar to happen again.
I
thought they would wait until Jon got there, but at 9.30am the consultant broke
my waters while I was on my own. As last time I had contractions more or less
straight away, still on my own and feeling a bit panicky that Jon wasn’t there
holding my hand. By the time Jon arrived
I had started on the gas and air and got into a lovely warm bath to help.
Unlike
my last labour; although the contractions had started they weren’t as intense
as soon as my waters were broken this time. At this point they were averaging
5-6 minutes apart so we were encouraged to go for a walk before I was put on
the drip at 11:30am.
So
we went for a walk and on our return at 11:30am I was told I was now 4cm
dilated. Things were moving in the right direction! I was put on the drip which
really geared things up; the pain suddenly got far more intense, contractions
far more regular and I was grabbing at the gas and air! At this point I think I was coping really
well.
At
around 1:30pm I was examined again and was now 6cm dilated. All the while the
drip was increased at regular intervals to keep encouraging the contractions
along. I remember things getting a lot more painful from here on in as the drip
was turned up. Around 3pm I had a
pethadine injection which did very little at all and when I was examined again
at 4:30pm and told I was still only 6cm dilated I had a big not-coping wobble
and asked for an epidural.
We
were now 7 hours into labour. I know each labour is different, but after
delivering Anabelle in 5 hours and always being told subsequent labours were ‘easier
and quicker’ I was feeling very emotional and desperate to have Alexander out
soon by this point.
The
epidural was a feat and a half. It appears I have a difficult spine to work
with.
The
anaesthetist arrived and spent 10 or so minutes going through all the risks
with me and saying he couldn’t start until he was sure I understood. Now I know
this is protocol but I was in full blown labour, having contractions every 2
minutes and really not in a fit state to be listening to him; and all the while
wishing he would just get on with it to give me a break from the pain.
Anyway,
he had two unsuccessful attempts at positioning the epidural and called for his
senior colleague to have go.
Senior
colleague has a go and manages to position the epidural but not at brilliantly
has he would have hoped. He explains he is unsure how effective it was going to
be. It actually was very effective; but
only for short bursts. For an hour or so I was feeling so much
better; still aware of the contractions, but they were now almost painless. For
a little while I felt much more able to cope again and re-acquired the calm
environment I wanted for my sons birth.
So
I started pushing. And pushing. And pushing. For over 2 hours. Alexander wasn’t
coming and I was exhausted.
Midnight
and Friday 14th October arrived and I was reaching the end of
anything I could cope with anymore. I
think I actually reached emotional meltdown levels, to the point where I was
begging them to help me. And help they
did, but only after Jon forcefully putting his foot down, saying enough was
enough and that I was finished and beyond exhausted and it was time to get our
baby out before my distress became his distress too.
I
don’t understand why they were initially reluctant to intervene but after
another examination which showed Xander hadn’t actually moved any further down
into my pelvis despite all my pushing efforts the Doctor agreed that they would
be unable to perform an instrumental delivery and arranged an emergency
c-section.
Because
of the ineffective epidural I had to have more needles in my back to give me a
spinal block and off we went to theatre. I was feeling frightened of the
surgery but relieved all in one go and I couldn’t believe how many people were
in the room!
And then there he was: Alexander Jon
Morgan came SCREAMING into the world at 00:45 on Friday 14th October
2011. Weighing a very healthy 8lb 13oz and 57cm long! (Whopping for 36 weeks!)
It
really was the most beautiful sound we’d ever heard and I instantly started
sobbing, before I’d even seen him,
completely relieved because he was alive.
The midwife showed him to us and then he was taken to side room for the
paediatrician to check him over with Jon.
They let Jon trim the cord and then Xander had cuddles with his Daddy for
20 minutes while I was being stitched back up.
As
soon as I was in the recovery room we had lovely skin-to-skin cuddles and we
took every bit of him in. Amazed by the amount of hair he has and just how much
he looks like his big sister.
Labour
recorded at 15 hours and 15 minutes.
It
wasn’t the birth I was expecting; after Anabelle I really did think I would be
able to push Alexander out too. But it really doesn't matter to me that he
ended up being a 'sunroof' baby - he's here in my arms and that is the only
thing that ever really mattered. The
de-brief about the c-section with consultant told me that his position wasn’t
great and that is why despite me pushing with all my might he wasn’t moving.
She also thinks he was possibly too big for me. I dread to think how heavy he would’ve been by
40 weeks!!
Since his birthday...
I became very
anaemic and it has only really been parts of yesterday and today now the iron
tablets are kicking in that I’ve started to feel normal in myself again.
Obviously I’m still very sore from the operation but that is to be expected and
coping well now when the painkillers are working!
It was hugely frustrating not being able to get
to Xander when he needed me in hospital as I was bed bound until the Saturday
morning; and even when I was able to get out of bed the amount of pain I was in
moving around and feeling so faint all the time made caring for him very difficult.
Feeling so much better now are home and
Jon is looking after us both.
Alexander
- has had some of the minor premmie
problems the baby-doctors had discussed with me on Tuesday. My poor little man
struggled with maintaining his temperature, blood sugars and is being slow to
take to feeding due to a bit of an under-developed suckle. The paediatricians
prescribed him formula top-ups while we were in hospital because he just wasn’t
taking any milk down. Now we are home we are trying our very best to get to
grips with breast-feeding.
Xander also
has jaundice and had to spend 18 hours under the UV phototherapy lamps. (Midwives
still keeping an eye on this now we’re home as he is still a little bit on the
yellow side.) Of course he wasn’t very impressed because it meant he was having
very little contact with us as he was only allowed to come out for feeds and
nappy changes. It was horrible for Jon and me too.
All in all Alexander has been a very brave boy
though; his little heels are covered in puncture marks from all the blood tests
he has had to have in his first week of life. He now weighs 8lb 4oz at his last weigh in on
Wednesday so we’re really hoping we can get feeding established now to get him
on the up again.
Jon
and I are just completely smitten by him. I love watching Jon with his baby
boy; he is just so proud and full of love! Makes me all gooey seeing my two boys together
and Alexander is blissfully unaware how precious he is to us both.
Yes
we’re completely shattered, of course this beautiful newborn time is stirring
up lots of painful emotions and missing Anabelle on a whole new level, yes we’re
already getting fairly sleep deprived and have lost all ability to manage our
time; but there isn’t a single thing we would change about finally being a ‘here
on earth’ Mummy and Daddy.
Our
dreams for Xander came true and we’re loving every minute.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
- Caz
- After Anabelle - Raising Rainbows. I'm Caz, Mummy to beautiful angel Belle and my wonderful rainbow boys, Xander, Zachy and Luc. Wife to Jon. Twitter @cazem Instagram @cazzyem
Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
Mumsnet Badge
8 comments:
Many many many congratulations! X
Your post made me cry - I'm so happy for you. It's wonderful that you have Alexander home but so poignant remembering Anabelle too. xx
so many congratulations enjoy your new little family xx
Thank you for sharing your wonderful story.
Well done you! I had a very long induced labour before an EMCS for similar reasons - she was just too big for me! You will feel better soon though, don't worry, and try not to overdo it.
Thank you for sharing and enjoy these next few precious weeks.
So happy to read your lovely story. I love your choice of "leaving hospital" outfit for Alexander - a RAINBOW jumper - for your super special rainbow baby! How beautifully perfect. I have bought box frames for my babies' first special top and booties (Great little trading company Keepsake box frame) so they are displayed on the wall on the landing and make me smile when I see how tiny the clothes are (babies grow sooo fast!) Try to take it as easy as possible in between looking after Xander (I know, I know - when/how?!) but do try and rest up a bit. And a thousand congratulations to you and Jon. xxx PS the scary thick CS scar WILL fade to a dainty thin pink line eventually - promise! Louise (well wisher) xxx
What an amazing story ending in the birth of a lovely baby boy! Hope you are feeling stronger now. I love his rainbow outfit!
I read this at the weekend and just sobbed, the photo of you leaving hospital with Alexander is just the best thing I've seen in a long time. I hope you're all settling in at home xxx JMC
Post a Comment